Why Not?

They would never have met in life. But here they are, in death, sharing a bench at a deserted station, waiting for the train to come to take them away. A withered old man, and a young man in his 20s.

B: I bet you can’t guess how old I am.

A: 85? How old are you?

B: I had my 97th birthday 2 weeks ago. My wife had long passed away. I wonder if I’d see her again, hah. We never said goodbye. She died suddenly, you know. I remember we used to go to the same diner every Thursday for burgers. Burgers weren’t evil, then. Nowadays burgers are supposed to kill. Maybe that’s what did her in. The diner went out of business soon enough. Oh it’s so long ago. I am so old. I am old. An old curmudgeon. I wet my bed now, ha. Perhaps I lived too long, ha ha. I am 97 years old. I smoked all my life. All those cigarettes finally killed me, ha ha… How old are you?

A: 25.

B: When I was 25, I had my first son! A boy! My god, you can’t imagine. I don’t imagine you are married?

A: No.

B: You can’t imagine what it’s like to have son. Gotta try it sometime [nudges the young man]. Or maybe it’s too late, ho ho. Well, maybe there’s a next life. Never too late, they say.

A: People say that. There’s a next life. I don’t believe it.

B: Maybe you ought to believe it. That’s your only chance to have a son.

A: Maybe I don’t?

B: Maybe you don’t. Maybe you don’t. But I had a house, and I built it myself. It was small at first. My family grew, and the house grew. My grandson has the house now. He’s an architect. Have I told you? And he loves my house. He tells people his grandpaw built it.

A: What happened to your son?

B: Well, he’s not getting the house. No way he’s getting the house.

A: Why not?

B: He died, that’s why, ha ha. He died young, actually. My wife, the poor woman was hit the hardest.

A: Oh. Sorry.

B: You want to know how he died?

A: I wasn’t going to ask.

B: But you want to know how he died? He killed himself. A bullet right through his brain.

A: Oh. Sorry to hear that.

B: Can you imagine that? Putting a gun into your mouth and pulling the trigger. The bastard. He just killed himself. Son of a bitch. Poor son of a bitch.

A: Hmmm.

B: I never understood why. His wife left him. OK. But he’s got a son to raise. He just left the kid behind. When I see my son again, by god, I am going to give him a good spank. My wife, she cried at night. She’d lock herself in the bathroom. She’d never say anything about it, and She’d never admit to it when I asked. I’d never forgive my son for having done that to her.

A: He didn’t do that to you.

B: How do you mean?

A: We don’t mean to hurt people.

B: Hmmmph. Say, how did you die?

A: Well…

B: Bullshit.

A: Ya.

B: Why did you do it?

A: I don’t know. I don’t know why I killed myself. I don’t know why I was born. I certainly didn’t mean to hurt anyone. It doesn’t make any difference whether I was there or not.

B: So here you are.

A: So here I am.

B: You are 25?

A: Ya. I was.

B: And you’ve had enough?

A: Uh…

B: How did you do it?

A: Gun.

B: [Fascinated. Turns his body towards the young man.] So you’ve had enough? At 25? You’ve not married. You’ve not built your own house? You’ve not watched your son growing up, and then his son. And you’ve not had the chance to attend your own son’s funeral, har har. You’ve had enough??

A: I had nothing to look forward to. Why would I want to get married? Because people do? Why do I want to build my own house? Who the fuck build their own houses now? I’ve had enough. It was my way of maximizing my happiness.

B: You don’t have to build your own house, no. Hey, you don’t have to find a pretty girl to marry if you don’t want to. But why wouldn’t you? My wife and I were high school sweethearts. I remember asking her out for the prom. I was SURE she’d say no. I guess nobody else tried their luck on her, ha ha. But hey, I am not saying you have to be like me… you could… what’s your name?

A: Will.

B: Willy. I am John. My wife calls me Johnny, but you can call me Jack.

Will: Ok.

Jack: So Willy…

Will: Don’t you think it’s too late to talk about this?

Jack: No. Heck, it’s never…

Will: Anyway, there’s no next life. It’s just a rumour.

Jack: You think this is it?

Will: I dunno.

Jack: Don’t you want another chance?

Will: I wouldn’t know what to do with it. Maybe you should have another go at it. You seem to have enjoyed it.

Jack: Ha! No. I’ve had enough. I’ve built my own house. And I loved my wife. My son… bah. My grandson, oh he’s wonderful. I’ve had enough. This is enough.

Will: You’ve had no regrets?

Jack: Regrets! Hell ya. That nurse at the home is cute. I wish I could have a go at her. She’s old enough to be your mother though, ha ha. Say, uh… uh… [gesturing] uh…

Will: Will.

Jack: Ya Will, what is it that makes you want to live? You know, you wake up every morning, and you think to yourself, “another day, and by God, I am gonna grab it by the balls.” You know what I am saying?

Will: If I had known, I wouldn’t be here, would I?

Jack: There weren’t things you wanted to do?

Will: Sure. I’d like to see Rome.

Jack: So… why are you here? You should be in Rome!

Will: Bah! What difference does it make now? [Looks away.]

Jack: Look, son, you are still so young. You really shouldn’t be here, talking to an old geezer like me. You should see Rome. You should go back.

Will: Go back? Don’t be ridiculous! Who do you think I am… Houdini? I blew my brain out. The mortician probably had to put the pieces of my skull back together and clean me up good for the funeral. Which, of course, was none of my business. I am already here, there’s no going back. I hope there’s nothing going forward.

Jack: So you are one of them.

Will: Them what?

Jack: Them… ex… ex… ex commune.. ist.

Will: Existentialist?

Jack: Ya, ya. That.

Will: I am over-educated, alright.

Jack: Well do you have somebody you care about?

Will: Yes.

Jack: And you don’t give a damn?

Will: [Flares] I do! [Breaks] And I am sorry… I am really sorry. But I just can’t. I just… I just can’t. I told her it’s not her fault. There’s nothing more she could do. She’s done everything for me. And I am really sorry.

Jack: Why?

Will: I don’t know. [pauses] Anyway, here I am.

Jack: So here you are. You know, I’ve never forgiven my son. And I don’t think I ever will.

Will: I don’t expect her to forgive me.

Jack: But I still love him.

Will: I am sure you do.

Silence befalls them. They share the bench, as two strangers would, as though the conversation never took place.

A train comes into the station. The conductor approaches the two men and examines their tickets. He returns the ticket to the young man, and gestures him to keep waiting. Then the conductor takes the old man’s luggage, helps the old man to get up, then onto the train.

The train leaves the station. The young man is left alone on the deserted platform. He takes out a picture from his pocket. He says something to the woman in the picture, then he kisses her. Then he puts the picture back into his pocket. He waits.

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